It's their life, for cryin' 'Outloud'

By PETER D. KRAMER
THE JOURNAL NEWS
(Original Publication: September 16, 2005)

The 49 seats at Shine House, the cozy little Ossining home of Blueberry Pond Theatre ensemble, are the most comfortable ones you'll find in any legitimate theater: They look like they're from a law office, all burgundy with fine appointments and brass plates that announce who donated them.

But if you're lucky enough to find yourself in one of those 49 seats this weekend, chances are you'll be squirming.

Because onstage, ten young women, raging from 12 to 17, will make you remember what it was like to be, well, 12 to 17. The show, "Outloud," is billed as "a new musical about growing up female." It touches on friendships, body image, self-esteem, doubts, expectations, stereotypes, eating disorders, first kisses and suicide.

It's a snapshot of a tumultuous time in a young woman's life. It addresses with certainty the uncertainty of their lives, including what one character calls "self-induced-why-am-I-such-a-jerk pressure."

Says Susannah Jones, 16, of Croton-on-Hudson, who plays Ally: "You can be insensitive to people around you, especially parents. I know I've been a jerk to my mom. I tell myself, 'Don't be a jerk to your mom.' But then you think 'I don't really have the time or energy not to be a jerk.' You think 'Why am I being like this?' But you can't help it."

Talking about these issues — which is part of the message of "Outloud" — makes for a powerful experience.

"I have a feeling that it's much more intense when you're watching it than when you're in it," says 12-year-old Alexandra Ingber, of Ossining, who plays Tracy .

The cast members are sure they're having an impact.

The audiences are listening.

Lexie Frare, 16, of Nyack, plays Tricia. She says her mom and the parents of friends who have seen the show "are getting the idea that we're teenagers and things are stressful and things are different than when they were kids. So I think it's a good show for parents to see along with kids."

There's "The Daddy Song"

"Daddy, show me you know me.

Daddy, hear what I say.

See me, not who you'd like me to be

But love me just for who I am."

At one performance, during this song, 12-year-old Lila Coogan of Ossining , who plays Whitney, looked into the audience and caught the eye of her father.

"After the show, he thought I was singing it to him. And he was like, 'Oh my God, I am so sorry.'" Her mom, it turns out, was affected by the show, but resolute. "She said, 'You know what? I'm exactly like those moms in the play and I'm not going to change. Because if I change, then you're not going to get any of your work done. ... I'm gonna be on you all the time.' And I was like, 'Thanks, Mom.' "

The audiences are talking.

Stephanie Baier, 16, of Valhalla , says seeing "Outloud" has prompted friends and adults to open up to her about long-hidden issues or events in their lives. "This is exactly the impact (we) were looking for."

Amy Politi, 14, of Somers, who plays Tracy , says the show helped her at home: "If I wasn't in it and I saw it, I know that I would really like it because even though it's depressing, it has a hopeful message at the end. It made things better for me because, even if only for a few minutes, it gave me something to talk about with my sister."

The audiences are also crying.

"It's really cool to hear people crying," says Becca Quinn, 17, of Ossining, who plays Elizabeth. "It means you're doing a good job and getting the message of the play through to people."

The message, says Lexie Frare, is clear: "There's all these stereotypes about girls. Like a girl needs to be tinier than her boyfriend. A girl has to be meek and cute and quiet. That's just not the way that we are. It just doesn't work like that."

"We don't want to be what is expected of us," she says. "We want to be what we want to be. We want to be wild and crazy and have a good time. And have a pimple. We want to eat cake. Like, it's allowed."

Director Gayle Hudson, who wrote the play and who heads Blueberry Pond's Young People's Program, says she's delighted that her cast — and the audience — gets it.

"It verifies for me that the themes are very specific to young girls and these issues aren't going away any time soon," she says.

But "Outloud" is going away soon. It runs this weekend and next. And there are only 49 seats at each show.

If you get in, you can sit in a comfortable chair and see how difficult it is to be young these days.

And, yes, maybe squirm a little.